Single guy but not creepy

Comments

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  Creepy is about behavior. Do you mean youre not sure if you are acting like a creep?

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  Respect, patience and don't take rejection personally.As a single guy lucky enough to be included at a party, we have to be on our best behaviour.Only creepy if you make it that way. Best of luck

  reply

  like

• 

  DynamicCouple36

  8 years ago

  in the swinging scene, is single guys that get into couples only clubs & parties, masquerading as a couple. Once through the door they generally part ways and he becomes single again. If it’s a couples only party or club, it is that way for a reason. Single guys are not wanted and not welcome . And so they find devious ways to get in? That’s the unacceptable part. Clearly, they are with the female simply to gain access to the club or party. The problem arises when they then start behaving in an unacceptable manner at the party / within the club - yes clearly they want to get a “root” and it’s when they start stalking, soliciting , touching and groping (without first asking ) is when they ate seen as being creepy. It’s not all single guys though. We are a couple and we do things together as a couple. If we go to a club or party, and we decide to play, we do so together as a couple. - Posted from rhpmobile

  reply

  like

• 

  Freaky_Fun

  8 years ago

  Have a look at the Single Men at Venues thread in the Swingers Lifestyle section. I would cut and paste or whatever but I'm a little technically challenged 😝 I think Serendipity hits the nail on the head and re-enforces what Meander has said. It's only the few that make it hard no pun intended for the all the decent men.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  Last party I went to with a play friend we had a guy follow us around for an hour, didn’t speak a word. No thanks. Be approachable and try not to linger. - Posted from rhpmobile

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  As Meander said above, creepiness is mostly about not respecting boundaries. And it's not just about overt things like violating physical consent. It can be more subtle things - like continuing to give someone attention when they're quite clearly ignoring and not interested. Unfortunately, we live in a culture which is very bad at this. The archetypal male is virtually a creep by default (think romantic comedies). It really just comes down to not pushing things when you get disinterested signals.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  Yes agree, no different to RL

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  Your topic heading is a little sad, highlights how hard it is for single men not to be presumed a creep by default, due to the behavior of a few

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  We played with another single guy as he was approachable and friendly. Repected both of us as individuals. More likely some single guys expectations are skewed that they merely need to turn up to get laid. We are still people that like a chat and buildup even given the pretence of what we’re there for. BB - Posted from rhpmobile

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  Be approachable. If you don't ask you don't know. You are there for a reason so play nice, accept you are going to get a no, read the signals if you can. You have been in the situation with your partner so I guess think about how you wanted things to go when you were partnered and then look at the perspective of how the single guys approached you?? Goodluck Ms Midnight

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  I’ve been on the other side, as a single female, at swingers parties. I know not many women go alone but I’d like there to be more single men as I don’t akwats want to be the ‘third wheel’ so to speak, of a couple. Also, couples can be just as creepy as single men are presumed to be! I’ve had an experience when a particular couple just couldn’t take no for an answer and made me feel quite uncomfortable all night. As someone else said, conversation and build-up are just as important in that situation even given the theme of the evening. And no means no! Luckily I managed to find an amazing couple to make me feel better (and act as security!) that night 😉 - Posted from rhpmobile

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  I've tried for so long to have some fun, I guess the stupid creepy guys have basicaly stuffed it, for all single guys, especialy the straight ones, I'd love to go and try a club, But Im sure I'd be just watching every one else having fun, just sitting around horny and nothing, - Posted from rhpmobile

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  I doubt you'd be left alone for too long 😊

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  Nah. Married guys can be just as creepy. As Mim says. It’s an attitude, a way of coming across and understanding and respecting people’s words and body language. I don’t see single men as creepy, but they can be pushy at times.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  The single guys going with a single girl and then splitting up, thats a you specific problem though. You and other couples like you but there are lots of couples who do not play together at couple parties. Especially in this world, what is a couple is so fluid, if the hosts allow 2 people in and the two people split up (the guy but also the single girl is leaving the guy too to go off on her own) then thats great. Ofcourse if they lied about being married or in love or its a specific you are definitely have to be together couples party then no but most are not like that. The touching and groping and all that is obviously wrong regardless of anywhere but i think, whilst you are allowed to have that pev its a little unfair to the many other couples who want to play separately at parties and to the single guys and girls who go to couples parties as a couple but who then split up and are welcomed by other couples. I have only ever been to parties where i already knew couples or with a lady friend who wanted an escort and who was really nice and introduced me so i cant talk of it being uncomfortable at all. I have found everyone awesome and there is something incredibly fun about talking to a strange lady wearing just a corset about skiing whilst porn is playing on screens and in the main play room a dozen people are having sex. Its fantastic.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  8 years ago

  You'll create good vibes and probably feel more relaxed. Then any 'can I join you?' or 'mind if I touch ...?' queries will [probably] be better received. No guarantees though. Good luck.

  reply

  like