F63
When does it become cheating?
November 13 2010
Comments
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RHP User
15 years ago
whether you are married or in a committed relationship, a swinger, a wanker, a misogynistic bastard or not, if you fail to treat your partner with the basic respect and dignity that they deserve, you cheat them. if you cant give to them the honesty that THEY should have because you are wrapped up in what YOU need then you should not be there. HONESTY means not telling a lie, a half truth. or a fabrication. Honesty is looking your partner in the eye and stating the facts.RESPECT is treating them with dignity. how about instead of being selfish, self centered and conceited, we think about our partners need? what is it that she/he needs from you for the relationship to work. how about being mature enough to put someone else before yourself. Cheating is NOT the behavior of reasonable adults, its what juveniles do, spoiled little boys and girls who really should be treated with as much contempt as we can muster. you dont deserve respect, trust
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RHP User
15 years ago
THERE IS NO END TO THIS TOPIC..AMAZING HOW MANY DIFFERENT TAKES PEOPLE HAVE ON IT.SOME UNI STUDENT WILL DO A THESIS ON IT AND ALL THE RESEARCH THEY NEED IS ALL HERE..STILL NO CLEAR ANSWER BUT MANY OPINIONS.
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RHP User
15 years ago
It occurred to me today that most of the opinions provided have been from the perspective of a cheater rather than a cheatee. Would everyone's answers be the same if it was your partner cheating on you? If not, a rethink may be wise...
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Snowshoe' It occurred to me today that most of the opinions provided have been from the perspective of a cheater rather than a cheatee. Would everyone's answers be the same if it was your partner cheating on you? If not, a rethink may be wise... at last. someone else gets what we saw but didn't want to say, for fear of being abused and vilified.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'hotqld45' To insinuate the majority on this thread are cheaters, some insecurities yes but, nope not going to bite.No, you wally - I'm not suggesting anything of the sort! I'm saying that it seems to me that most people have been forming their opinions by starting the thought process with "I would be cheating on my partner if I...". Starting with "my partner would be cheating on me if..." may provide them with a different answer, perhaps rounding and enriching their opinions.Nice non-bite....
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RHP User
15 years ago
omg 'wally' is name calling? i call my grand kids worse? wally? ffs.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'hotqld45' There is no need for personal name calling in the forums... but you credited me with a notion that was so far removed from what I meant that I wondered how you even got there. No need for a hizzyfit...
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RHP User
15 years ago
I wonder if it would be different? Do we all consider our actions above board when we maybe flirt or tease a little as we know we dont mean anything by it. BUT if it was the actions of our partner, and we dont know that they mean nothing by it, we can only hope they dont...would our answers be differant?
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Snowshoe' It occurred to me today that most of the opinions provided have been from the perspective of a cheater rather than a cheatee. Would everyone's answers be the same if it was your partner cheating on you? If not, a rethink may be wise... Yes, that's what I keep saying. Our experiences develop our world view and perspectives on this very emotional topic. Some people have it in their heads that being cheated on is the line in the sand that draws an end to their relationship but that need not be so. HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Snowshoe' It occurred to me today that most of the opinions provided have been from the perspective of a cheater rather than a cheatee. Would everyone's answers be the same if it was your partner cheating on you? If not, a rethink may be wise... Yes, that's what I keep saying. Our experiences develop our world view and perspectives on this very emotional topic. Some people have it in their heads that being cheated on is the line in the sand that draws an end to their relationship but that need not be so. HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
If it was i that was cheated on then i would have to ponder why???...Yeh we get all emotional about it because we have had our ego severely dented but at the end of the day perhaps our partner wouldn't have felt the urge to stray if we had stopped and listened.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky' Quoting 'Snowshoe' It occurred to me today that most of the opinions provided have been from the perspective of a cheater rather than a cheatee. Would everyone's answers be the same if it was your partner cheating on you? If not, a rethink may be wise... Yes, that's what I keep saying. Our experiences develop our world view and perspectives on this very emotional topic. Some people have it in their heads that being cheated on is the line in the sand that draws an end to their relationship but that need not be so. HugsStalky yes it would be that line for us. there would be no taking it back. if either of us were to cheat, and be found out, there would be no 'getting over it'. but then we are adults and able to control our basest urges, so that wont happen. and that, you can "absolutely trust" ffs!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Chatting is ok as long as its just chatting as friends...And your partner knows your doing this :) there shouldnt be secrets in a relationship.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'angelsdream' Chatting is ok as long as its just chatting as friends...And your partner knows your doing this :) there shouldnt be secrets in a relationshipAND YOUR PARTNER KNOWS...........What a novel concept....... finally someone with some insight
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RHP User
15 years ago
"Hunni i'm home" "hey baby how was your day?" "yeh good..I flirted outragiously with Bob's secretary again..fuck she's hot..perfect tits and cute tight ass..geez ide love to fuck her..how was yours?" "yeh pretty good..this afternonn i got really horny so went and masterbated and had an awesome orgasm thinking of such and such ravgaing me..it was so hot..mmmmm" I think we all cheat..its indelibly programmed in our feeble little brains..Since Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden we all want to sample the forbidden fruit!! Amen!!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'hotqld45'You naughty girl! How comes another one of your threads get shut down? Cant see why with the last one but that was destined to be a emotional females thread! I enjoyed reading it daily! The first of one of my topics to get shut down. The others have been started by someone other than I. It got shut down through repeated PERSONAL attacks. Just a reminder to stick to the topics and not drag people, family and friends into things.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'blonde7915'I think cheating is when you don't tell your partner what you are doing, or do not want them find out.
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RHP User
15 years ago
This is really simple to define.... and I don't know why all the fuss and animosity develops over it... I mean... if you have to keep a relationship your having a secret then you shouldn't be having it. That's not too hard a pill to swallow is it?Whether you do have a secret relationship or not is of no further interest to me... I mean.. you will have your reasons one way or another and it ain't nobody's business to go around slamming you, pointing you out and saying your reasons for indulging in that secret relationship aren't good enough.....HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
For mine, it's pretty black and white. If you're chatting, all well and good. I'd be fairly sure that most partnered people don't know all their partner's friends. It's really no different to picking up the phone and calling that person, is it? However, once the intent is there for something more than just "Hi How's the weather?" and the partner is not in the know, it crosses the line. As far as RHP is concerned, sure it's a sex site, but you can meet new friends anywhere......I've met some nice people here online, but I ain't got lucky yet! lol
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RHP User
15 years ago
i agree
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RHP User
15 years ago
lol this forum topic lives still? omg someone put it down! smother it with a pillow or something......ffs
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'XS' It becomes cheating when you lie. As soon as you lie to your partner about something that you've done, it's cheating (although that doesn't mean you get up and walk out of the relationship,it depends what they've done). You're betraying a trust and you're lie proves that you know your partner would be pissed and upset- so you lie. I've experienced this first hand and it sucks to have this done to you by someone that you think loves and cares for you.....and then they try to brush it off as nothing serious. Give me a break...if it was me doing it to them instead, I'd guarentee they'd see it diferently then.
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